God’s Healing for Life’s Losses: How to Find Hope When You’re Hurting

The Lesson Plan of Suffering

Countdown to God’s Healing: I’m excited to announce that BMH Books will release my fifth book soon (in April 2010). To read a sample section of God’s Healing for Life’s Losses: How to Find Hope When You’re Hurting click here. To pre-order your autographed copy at 30% off, visit here.

As we countdown to the release, I’ll be sharing periodic excerpts, such as today’s post: The Lesson Plan of Suffering.

Opening Our Hands to God

The Apostle Paul teaches us suffering’s lesson plan. Suffering and death are meant to teach us our need again.

“We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead” (2 Corinthians 1:8-9).

In suffering, God is not getting back at you; He is getting you back to Himself. The actual experience of dying persuades the little god that he is finite after all. When Paul felt the sentence of death, he understood that his only hope was the dead-raising God.

Suffering opens our hands to God. It was Augustine who declared, “God wants to give us something, but cannot, because our hands are full—there is nowhere for Him to put it.”

Delicious Despair

Moses taught the same truth in the passage Jesus quoted during His temptation. Why does God allow us to endure desert wanderings? According to Deuteronomy 8 and Matthew 4, it is to humble us, teaching us how desperately needy we are.

God loves us too much to allow us to forget our neediness. God makes therapeutic use of our suffering. Luther taught that suffering creates in the child of God a delicious despair. Suffering is God’s putrid tasting medicine of choice resulting in delicious healing.

Healing medicine for what? For our ultimate sickness—the arrogance that we do not need God. Suffering causes us to groan for home and to live in hope. The author of Hebrews, surveying the landscape of Old Testament journeys, shows us the way home.

“All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them” (Hebrews 11:13-16).

God refuses to allow us to get too comfy here. Instead, He allows suffering—daily casket processionals—to blacken our sun so we cry out to His Son. Suffering reminds us that we’re not home yet.

At least, that’s God’s intent. Satan plots an altogether different strategy. We learn about his scheme in our next post.

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What lessons are you learning from suffering?

Tags: Augustine, God's Healing for Life's Losses, Grief, Grieving, Healing, Luther, Suffering, Sufferology

Searching for God in the Rubble of an Earthquake

In terms of the toll of human lives, the terrorist tragedy of 9/11 will likely pale in comparison to the earthquake tragedy of 1/12/10. How do we respond as Christians? Certainly, we can and should respond monetarily, giving graciously. Certainly, we can and should respond prayerfully, praying fervently.

But how do we respond theologically? How do we even begin to decipher the deeper meaning behind 1/12/10? How do we grapple with such immense human suffering in light of our faith in a sovereign God?

What we need are Cliffs Notes—an instruction manual on how not to read life’s grand adventure and on how to read life’s heroic narrative. No one in the Bible is a better reading tutor for the topic of unspeakable tragedy than Job. Join me as we read Job’s grand adventure narrative and learn that God and Satan use the same material—the story of our lives. Whose interpretation of our life story will we believe? Satan’s or God’s?

To interpret Job’s story and ours accurately, we need to understand that God tells it on two levels. We find the smaller story or the earthly, temporal perspective, and the larger story or the heavenly, eternal perspective. Satan desires that we focus only on the smaller story and conclude that “Life Is Bad, and So Is God.” God urges us to focus upon the larger story and realize that “Life Is Bad, but God Is Good.” One of the keys to our spiritual life, especially during times of personal suffering or national tragedy, is to move people from Satan’s view of life toward God’s perspective on this life and the next.

To continue reading this post (it’s long–one can hardly respond to such tragedy in brief, pithy phrases…) visit my RPM  Ministries Free Resource document.

Tags: Biblical Sufferology, Earthquake, Haiti, Suffering

*Note: If you’re disappointed that I’m saying that some biblical counseling is only half biblical, then please read my comments at the end of my first post in this series: http://tinyurl.com/n8k799.

My Premise

Some modern biblical counseling considers the seriousness of sin—sinning, but spends much less time equipping people to minister to the gravity of grinding affliction—suffering. When we provide counseling for sin, but fail to provide counseling and counselor training for suffering, then such biblical counseling is only half biblical.

Secluded in Our Ivory Towers

Though acknowledging suffering, it became an underdeveloped element of some biblical counselors. When they did address suffering, it often became “private preaching” with a moralistic, non-relational, directive bent.

Why did this occur? Preaching training, theological perspectives, views of the image of God, and personal sin issues all combined with the historical setting to “set up” early biblical counseling for movement away from the Church’s historic practice and the Bible’s comprehensive focus on sustaining and healing for suffering.

Non-Comprehensive Theological Training

Frank Lake, who we quoted in post one of this series, traces the neglect of suffering to a shift in the focus of ministry training.

“If theological training had not lost its Galilean accent on persons encountered by the roadside or on the roof tops, in favor of libraries and essays in the schools, it would be unnecessary to argue the case for pastoral listening (empathy) and dialogue (conversing with, not private preaching at).”

Secluded in our ivory towers, far from the gravity of grinding affliction, we lose our perspective and our sensitivity. Pastors taught in such settings are trained to preach at people. They then enter a parish with suffering people—people like Job and the man born blind in John 9. Lake describes what stereotypically occurs when pastors trained to talk at sinners are forced to face sufferers.

“The pastoral counselor, in spite of himself, finds himself tittering out his usual jocular reassuring prescriptions, minimizing the problem, and thumping in optimism or the need for further effort. He has the ingrained professional habit of filling every unforgiving minute with sixty seconds’ worth of good advice.”

Trained to preach, but not trained to counsel, many pastors, to this day, are ill-equipped to help the suffering. Theirs is an instinctive activism that revolts against a caring presence and words of comfort. They assume that a directive response is best for the pastor’s busy schedule, and that the preaching mode is best for the care and cure of souls. All of this, despite what the Bible and church history teaches.

Non-Comprehensive Theology

Another reason why some biblical counselors are ill-equipped to help the suffering relates to a non-comprehensive theological perspective. The early biblical counseling movement was launched based upon one version of Calvinistic, Reformed theology. However, it was not the comprehensive version practiced by the Reformers like Luther or by Calvin himself. Both Luther and Calvin had a comprehensive, compassionate theology that included a focus on sin and suffering and included a focus on creation, fall, and redemption.

Early pioneers in biblical counseling, reacting against the pendulum of liberalism, the social gospel, and secular psychology, added to it their focus on the fall, sin, and depravity. Such factors were a recipe for biblical counseling that failed to address suffering biblically.

Focusing on the fall, sin, and depravity, and not as much on creation and our original design, and not as much on redemption and dignity in Christ and deprivation and suffering, they defined and described counseling as confronting sin and minimized the scope of true pastoral ministry.

Non-Comprehensive Image of God

Additionally, some biblical counselors tended to focus on the “volitional” element in the Imago Dei. That is, when they considered the image of God in human beings, they focused on the will, actions, and behaviors (and in later years on motivation)—putting off and putting on right actions. As biblical counseling developed, it began to focus more on the mind—putting off and putting on a right thinking—mind renewal.

However, to this day, there is not as much focus on the relational aspects that the Puritan Jonathan Edwards called “the religious affections”—longings, desires, thirsts, etc. And, to this day, some biblical counselors consider emotions to be “the black sheep of the image bearing family.”

Valuing reason and action above affections and emotions, when they did address suffering, they did so with a focus on right actions and right responses in reaction to suffering, while minimizing the emotional and relational aspects of and responses to suffering.

Personal Sin and Sinful Fear

Since the Bible insists on comprehensive and compassionate ministry that both confronts the sinning and comforts the suffering, and we fail to do this, then part of the reason must be internal. That is, even given all the historical, cultural factors, we can’t blame externals for our failure to do what the Bible calls us to do—comfort the suffering.

The personal sin of the fear of man is another reason that some biblical counselors fail to address suffering. Preachers and pastors (and lay people) are terrified, scared to death, to enter hurts deeply. They are much more comfy behind the pulpit generalizing about life, then facing suffering people face-to-face and moving into their hurting lives.

If they do come face-to-face with a suffering soul, it is much easier, much safer, to see counseling as problem-solving and to treat the soul as if it is a car engine to be fixed or a computer virus to be eliminated, then it is to relate soul-to-soul. Teach truth. Exhort right response. Talk. But weep with those who weep? But listen empathetically? But enter deeply? But sustain? But climb in the casket?

We can explore externals, but the reality is, the bottom line is, when pastors, spiritual friends, and biblical counselors fail to engage in biblical sustaining and healing for suffering—it is a sin.

Where Do We Go From Here

So far we’ve seen what we should do: care-front sinning and comfort suffering. So far we’ve seen why we have not done so: historical, cultural, theological, and personal factors that led to a minimizing of sustaining and healing for suffering.

Next we’ll explore how the minimizing of suffering negatively impacts Body life—the natural, ongoing, daily one-another ministry of God’s people in the church.

[i]Clark, Memoirs of the Wesley Family, 398.

*Note: If you’re disappointed that I’m saying that some biblical counseling is only half biblical, then please read my comments at the end of this post.

My Premise

Some modern biblical counseling considers the seriousness of sin—sinning, but spends much less time equipping people to minister to the gravity of grinding affliction—suffering. When we provide counseling for sin, but fail to provide counseling and counselor training for suffering, then such biblical counseling is only half biblical.

The Great Cloud of Biblical Counseling Witnesses

The Bible exhorts us to honor and learn from those who have gone before us:

“Remember the days of old; consider the generations long past. Ask your father and he will tell you, your elders, and they will explain to you” (Deuteronomy 32:7).

“Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for yours souls” (Jeremiah 6:16a).

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us” (Hebrews 12:1).

So, how did the great cloud of biblical counseling witnesses in Church history deal with suffering? Well, for the detailed answer, please refer to:

Soul Physicians (http://tinyurl.com/d96hc6),

Spiritual Friends (http://tinyurl.com/qh5tj4),

Beyond the Suffering (http://tinyurl.com/cm96x6),

Martin Luther’s Pastoral Counseling (http://tinyurl.com/ovw588),

Sacred Friendships (http://tinyurl.com/ql8fqc).

The Readers’ Digest Version

As Church historians have probed the history of personal ministry, they have categorized all “people-ministry” using the four tasks of sustaining and healing for suffering, and reconciling and guiding for sinning. Though different terms were used in different eras, these historians have found consistent categories, definitions, and descriptions. Historically, comprehensive biblical care of people always involved the twin functions of soul care for suffering and spiritual direction for sinning through the four ministries of sustaining, healing, reconciling, and guiding.

John McNeil’s A History of the Cure of Souls traces the art of soul care throughout Church history and shows that Christians always provided ministry for suffering and sin.

“Lying deep in the experience and culture of the early Christian communities are the closely related practices of mutual edification and fraternal correction.”

Speaking of the Apostle Paul, McNeil notes:

“In such passages we cannot fail to see the Apostle’s design to create an atmosphere in which the intimate exchange of spiritual help, the mutual guidance of souls, would be a normal feature of Christian behavior.”

Throughout his historical survey, McNeil explains that mutual edification involves soul care through the provision of sustaining (consolation, support, and comfort) and healing (encouragement and enlightenment) for suffering. Fraternal correction includes spiritual direction through the provision of reconciling (discipline, confession, and forgiveness) and guiding (direction and counsel) for sinning.

Historians of soul care, Clebsch and Jaekle, found that pastoral care has historically involved “helping acts, done by representative Christian persons, directed toward the healing, sustaining, guiding, and reconciling of troubled persons whose troubles arise in the context of ultimate meanings and concerns” (Clebsch and Jaekle, Pastoral Care in Historical Perspective, p. 4).

How extensive has the twin ministries of soul care for suffering and spiritual direction for sinning been?

“The Christian ministry of the cure of souls, or pastoral care, has been exercised on innumerable occasions and in every conceivable human circumstance, as it has aimed to relieve a plethora of perplexities besetting persons of every class and condition and mentality. Pastors rude and barely plucked from paganism, pastors sophisticated in the theory and practice of their profession, and pastors at every stage of adeptness between these extremes, have sought and wrought to help troubled people overcome their troubles. To view pastoral care in historical perspective is to survey a vast endeavor, to appreciate a noble profession, and to receive a grand tradition” (Clebsch and Jaekle, p. 1).

Have we in the biblical counseling movement received or ignored this grand tradition of biblical counseling both for suffering and for sin?

Where Do We Go from Here?

Tomorrow, I’ll address the question, “What might it look like to train pastors and lay people to be soul physicians and spiritual friends who deal with both suffering and sin?”

*Note: Why I Am Addressing This Topic

All who have followed my ministry know that I am a bridge-builder and not a wall-builder. You might wonder then, “Bob, why blog about something that is surely to be controversial?”

Those who follow my ministry also know that I equip God’s people to change lives with Christ’s changeless truth through comprehensive, compassionate, and culturally-informed biblical counseling and spiritual formation.

Biblical counseling that fails to deal with suffering, fails the test of comprehensive, compassionate, and culturally-informed biblical counseling. I would be a hypocrite to my calling if I remained silent.

Others might wonder, “Are you talking about a particular ‘model’ of modern biblical counseling, or about a particular person or persons who are writing today?”

No. I am not. This is not an attack against. These blogs are not directed toward any one person or group.

These blogs are directed to all of us—myself included—who love biblical counseling. They are for all of us—myself included—who need good Bereans to help us to assess how biblical or unbiblical our approaches to biblical counseling truly are. I write to help, not to hurt. I write to equip, not to attack. I write to start a conversation, not to finish one.

Please join the conversation.